A little humor from the past - Andy Rooney on Sex
|
Posted:Nov 24, 2020 10:03 am
Last Updated:Jul 13, 2021 6:47 am
2760 Views
|
When I was born, I was given a choice - a big pecker or a good memory...
I don't remember what I chose
Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory
There are only two four letter words that are offensive to men - 'don't' and 'stop', unless they are used together
Virginity can be cured
Having sex is like playing bridge - if you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand
I tried phone sex once, but the holes in the dial were too small (this one is for those of you who know what a rotary phone is)
Marriage is the only war where you get to sleep with the enemy
Question: What's an Australian kiss?
Answer: The same thing as a French kiss, only down under
A couple just married were happy with the whole thing. He was happy with the Hole and she was happy with the Thing
Question: What are the three biggest tragedies in a man's life?
Answer: Life sucks, job sucks and the wife doesn't.
Question: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
Answer: Breasts don't have eyes.
Despite the old saying, 'Don't take your troubles to bed', many men still sleep with their wives!
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
First Sessions
|
Posted:Nov 11, 2020 8:00 pm
Last Updated:Jun 23, 2021 3:45 am
3428 Views
|
I end up writing this a lot so I'm just putting this here so I don't have keep doing it.
1st sessions are statically planned but are fluid. That means the woman walking through the door (or I hers) is unique. The only thing that is required is truth and honesty. Everything else depends on her. The purpose of a 1st session is get know her mind, know HER, not just her body and sometimes we never get exploring her body - nothing is required. Walking through a door does not mean you submit, it means you are willing learn and have enough trust level come through the door. However, one must ALWAYS listen their vibes (see that writing). I'm good with that.
So the door opens. She can come in or, if not interested just say, "I don't think this will work out" and walk away. I'm good with that. I respect that.
Once through the door, it is put her things down, coat off (winter) and shoes off. Then it is the 20-30 second hug. There is method that. It is not a sexual hug but a full on embrace that is - just a hug. Once it starts, I ask her let all her breath out and take as deep a breath as possible. I have her hold it for 2-3 seconds and have her let it all out - every bit and then repeat it. This helps get the jitters out. I then explain the rest of it. There are at least physiological benefits a 20-30 second hug - look it up. The one I'm after is the wee bit of oxytocin* that is released that helps with bonding and --- trust. The breathing takes up half the 20 seconds. Depending on the vibes I get, after the time is up I may lightly kiss her neck - or not. *(oxytocin is the drug released when a woman has an orgasm. It is often called the "love drug")
We then sit on the sofa to tal I prefer she be naked but that is a request, not a requirement. She can be fully, partially or not at all clothed. It is up her comfort level. The benefit of nudity is (besides the aesthetics LOL 😂 is that she will feel and be a bit vulnerable. Again this is a trust building exercise.
I ask questions about her, intimate and personal questions. I only require truth. There is no judgement, only understanding. She can ask of me anything she wishes - it is a 2 way interview. This part of the session is the longest and often is 45 minutes. A normal 1st session is between an hour and 1.25 hours but that is also fluid.
We talk determine what kind of sub she is. This can take more than one session but, we get a basic feeling. I talk of the symbolism of the positions, nudity, how one addresses their Dom and why. Protocols, her rights, what her known hard and soft limits are (often these are not known until I suggest a few), what she likes or wants to experiment with. We talk about her needs and perhaps why it gives her peace. We talk of WILLING submission. Even if she wants to be taken or forced into submission, she must give permission to do so - a consensual non-consent situation where rules are discussed. After that is established, it's all good.
The last part is getting into a position. I may explore her body - I want to find what takes her breath away, gasp, get goosebumps or makes her cringe. Again, this is fluid and depends on her. I'm aware of the trepidation and nervousness. Nothing is required.
My first sessions are about getting to know someone and to build trust. She needs to trust me and I need to trust her. I think if she walked through the door and I blindfolded her and bound her first thing, well, that just might make her need to bolt. She doesn't know me and I could do anything, some of which may be harmful. Should we ever do that, she needs to have the trust that all will be within her soft and hard limits, that she is safe and protected. That I am mindful of her needs and will do what I can meet them.
Now I know there are a hundred ways train and not everyone will agree with mine. This is just my way. My granddad was wrangler in the early 20th century. Farmers would seek him out get them a new as he always got the best. He might wait under a tree for 3 days until the one he wanted came along. But how did he break/tame them? He once told me - you break a with trust, pushing boundaries a little at a time but never crossing over the line. That way they are tame but still have the fire of their spirit. If you whip them into submission, literally break them, they are obedient but their fire is gone and it is the fire that makes a great .
I prefer a sub be tamed, not broken. To keep her fire. If, of course, that is who she is.
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Subspace and Orgasms
|
Posted:Oct 28, 2020 5:02 am
Last Updated:Nov 16, 2021 1:08 pm
3694 Views
|
Subspace is an altered state of mind. It is often described as floating in complete bliss and peace with the world blocked out. I think of it as the beginning and end of the movie, 'Gladiator' where he's floating along a field of grain. But how does one get there? How long does it last? What causes it?
The two ways I know how to get someone there is either intense prolonged pain (overload of adrenalin/other body counteractive pain drugs) or intense prolonged orgasms (overload of oxytocin). Not being into pain - giving or receiving (I'll give it you want it but it doesn't get me off) - I use continuous, non-stop orgasms that last for 3 to 20 minutes. Most women's orgasms last 3 to perhaps 8 seconds. It feels longer but if you time it? Nope, its pretty quick. But to have one that does not stop for 180 seconds, seconds - that's a different story.
The best length of time for me to give one is 5 minutes. She gets there and can stay there for half an hour or a bit more. A 20 minute orgasm though? She's there for at least 2 hours. Now when I say "she's there" that means she can't hardly move, nor does she want to. When she comes down from those clouds she's still not completely stable but, can at least sit up and walk straight. This time afterwards is called aftercare. No, you can't drive for a bit. So a 20 minute orgasm can keep you out of it for about 3 hours. A bit long for me to sit and wait, so, I prefer the 5, maximum minute (about 1.75 hours before stable).
The after affect can last for hours upon hours and even into another day. Without external negative influence it will gradually wear off after 1 or 2 days. Of course, a fight or some negative thing happening will quickly dissipate the oxytocin with other brain chemicals and you're back to normal.
What causes it? An overload of brain chemicals/hormones, etc. With pain (fear is also used) I believe it's probably adrenaline. With orgasms it's oxytocin. Oxytocin is called the "love drug" because it makes a woman feel close emotionally to whomever is giving it to her. It helps with bonding and trust and feeling close to someone. Every orgasm she has, it is released and is responsible for that wonderful feeling that orgasms give. Get an overdose of it and swoosh! You're taken to an altered state of being.
I love doing it. I enjoy giving immense pleasure. I enjoy getting a text the next day where she says her stomach and back muscles hurt and she just figured out it was from the orgasms. Arched back, pussy convulsing and clamping down so hard and sustaining that intense contraction, well, the muscles just aren't used to it. I enjoy discovering a woman's body - all her unknown erotic spots that make her pussy wet, nipples hard and takes her breath away. Yes, I enjoy that.
But it takes more than just mechanical knowledge. It takes trust. Just like the first time she squirts she thinks she has to pee but, no, hon, if you let it go you'll have a female ejaculation orgasm which is different that a clitoral or vaginal orgasm and is more intense and pleasurable. I whisper, "let it go." If she does she's shocked and then embarrassed. Yup, she's soaked the sheets. I have to tell her that it isn't pee - it is colorless and odorless. But she has to trust to let it go.
The same is true for the prolonged orgasm. Most often they're afraid they'll lose total control. Truth is, if you're in subspace you are 0% vulnerable because your mind is somewhere else. That takes trust let yourself go there and know that you're safe. So, it can take 3 or more sessions work up it. The oxytocin also encourages bonding and trust.
For me? Give her the various types of orgasms all at once, one right after the other. Pussy so contracted nothing can get in? Stimulate the clit. Clit a bit sore? Stimulate the pussy lips, if that g spot can get hit, do it, and back and forth keeping it going.
Mercy, I do so love success.
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Phishers and hookers
|
Posted:Sep 19, 2018 10:41 am
Last Updated:Oct 28, 2020 5:04 am
4072 Views
|
I AM looking for feedback on this as I seek understanding of some of my current opinions. I've been on and off here since the mid-90's. I feel bad for men that get suckered into these scams.
Since Craigslist removed their personals, tons of hookers have flooded the adult/hookup sites like this one. Nothing wrong with that if you're interested. The tips below will help you find them. Because of new laws, outright solicitation, etc. is illegal for the website. That means, I post on my profile, "I'll come to you for a price" or "i play by the hourly rate" and while I may or may not get into trouble, the website will be shut down. So, they have to be a bit creative but still hint at what they want - pay for play. Again, if you're into that, you're welcome for the tips.
Hookers: includes words/phrases like, trade, barter, generous, anytime anywhere, need help with bills, email me at ...., text me at ...., etc., struggling (student/newly divorced/separated), spoil me. I'll add to this as I see them, this is just the list that comes to mind.
A new one but obvious, a 24 yr old: HMU LOWEST 100
Phishers: includes some of the above. Should you start emailing outside this system it eventually gets to: joining a site, get an "ID" (this is used by those that advertise something like fuck me now, but, i have to make sure you're not some criminal), their bra size does not match their pic, their pic looks "professional" (now it's using selfies but the same selfie has different names and stats).
In emails they all have either no parents or one of them died (or is dying) and from 2 different countries. They currently reside somewhere other than their profile states AND they are not of the variety of women that travel (there are a lot of these types of women that are valid). They also are quite detailed in their information about themselves and want you to provide the same. This gives them, location, probably a first and maybe a last name, by knowing where you were raised, etc., a profile is created. Every bit of info you provide, goes into that profile. At some point they have enough to use your identity or blackmail (as in you're cheating or, you've a "responsible" job where activities on a site like this will get you fired.)
Phishers can never seem to cam/vid chat. Not talking about nudes or whatever, just a plain old vid chat like you might have with your mom. Verification that you're actually communicating with the person they say they are is impossible.
In either of these categories but mostly the phishing kind, a woman gets on here looking for a husband or soul mate. So, her soul mate/husband is someone that is a swinger and will allow her to swing, playing together or separate, someone that cheats, etc. Now, it is possible that people are looking for that. No problem. It usually translates to the woman wanting someone to pay her bills (or help with them), provide a house, medical, food, etc., someone to go to swinger parties with to hook up with someone else. I get that but I don't know why marriage would be part of that.
Usually, the pics are gorgeous women younger than 35. Searching (finding the same) pics on the web usually turn up very surprising results.
Same pic, very different stats. Yes, people do things to hide their identity in case someone recognizes them. Some women are looking for their husbands (and the other way around),
A phisher can never meet you. Doesn't matter where or when, some excuse to not meet and often it's "i want to get to know you better." Some of that is valid, of course. A lot is not. Someone is reading this and thinking what an asshole I am and are totally not interested. That's ok, LOL. From blogs and profiles, IM's, emails you do get a sense of the person. That sense should be enough to meet at noon in front of a police station, ya know? 1 minute in person is worth 10 hours of texting when it comes to chemistry and compatibility - if you're looking for that.
Spelling and grammar indicate she is using a translator page. I can understand texting on a phone and being drunk but when it is consistent, it wreaks of fake. I am perhaps more sensitive to this since I have , acquaintances, friends in many countries. Some of the languages I know, some not and sometimes I use translator pages (if you know the language try using the translator - some of the translations are hysterical).
It comes down to what YOU want and are looking for. Most are not looking for phishers so be wary.
I will also add to update your cupid settings. Being an old fart via calendar but a 28yr old in mind, i look at those things and try to not bother the women that have an "X" on the age thing. Want only a black man? Check it. Don't a black man? Check all that apply. (Absolutely nothing against blacks, it is simply an example and many women are looking for bbc - big black cocks).
Tell us men what you are looking for and be precise - a friend with benefits is not a fuck buddy. It is presumed that if you're looking for more than one hook up there would or should be some kind of compatibility. The difference? A fwb might take you to dinner/movie, etc., whereas an fb just drops by, ya'll have fun and he leaves. If you're into or not into one nighters, or don't care, say so. The more you specify the better your chances on getting what you want and need and not have to through 1000s of frogs.
And hon, if you're "just looking" specify what types of pics you want to see and if you'd like "tributes" (that's a pic of a guy's cum on your pic). If you're not going to meet under any circumstances (nothing wrong with that), just say so.
Comments? Insight?
|
|
|
1
comment
|
|
It's always something
|
Posted:Jul 11, 2018 11:10 am
Last Updated:Apr 16, 2024 2:33 am
3202 Views
|
I don't like fucking around with a gazillion women. I like one steady, consistent lover. Don't care if she's married and that may be the source of a problem.
Married women can be happily married but just need more sexual attention. Discretion is therefore called for and is needed so as to not foul up her marriage. No problem for me.
Recently a woman that loves her husband dearly and had no desire to leave him, fell in love. In and of itself, that's OK - makes for more passionate lovemaking. But when she's contemplating leaving her husband and/or is torn betwixt us, that's when I have to bow out. That part sucks totally - and not in any good way.
not interested in getting married. basically not interested in dating. Just a regular fuck buddy that needs what I need and goes on with their normal lives.
Age doesn't matter to but it does to a lot of women. It also doesn't matter to a lot of women, even the 18+ olds. But it seems the younger they are, the more flaky they are and I really not interested in one night stands.
So, back to the fishing pond, searching for a woman that is content with great sex in all its splendor, adventurous, unboring (not always vanilla, ya know), regular (as in often) trysts.
sigh
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Travelling
|
Posted:Apr 13, 2018 8:15 am
Last Updated:Jun 16, 2019 5:55 am
3466 Views
|
I used to travel the world extensively - 99 countries, 6 continents. Nearly all of them I went alone. I hooked up only in 2 of the countries - they were serious things and I ended up marrying one of them (divorced now).
I stopped some ago because I realized that travelling al totally sucked the big . It just was not fun.
I'm headed to China soon with my . It will be a great trip and the first in probably a decade (Mexico does not count).
I got to thinking what I want. I want a woman of any age (no, not a minor but 18 is ok) that would like to hit the skies and see the world on occasion. Yes, we'd have sex on the plane, sex at the attractions (even if its in the water closet) so that in the future, when I'd see a picture of that attraction, I could smile and remember. Having such woman would be ideal - an ongoing relationship but not headed to marriage. Is there such a woman? Will she reply here or hit me on - same handle (if you do, let me know in your first chat your handle here.)
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Informative
|
Posted:May 14, 2016 7:38 am
Last Updated:Jun 16, 2019 5:54 am
6717 Views
|
With the program screw ups SexBook Of Sex - Find Sex with Real People for Free programming of late there have been quite a few interesting observations. Why they don't use a test site instead of making things live before testing is beyond me.
So this last glitch ignores the gender preference on the "online now" search. Soooo many cock pics! mercy! Most of these guys' cocks are pitiful LOL. Then I wonder - what does a woman think when she sees a cock pic? Does she:
1. Get wet?
2. Think, "god, i want to climb on that" or
3. Think, I want to lie back and have him pound me
4. Think, I want that pounding me from behind and then in my ass
5. Think, That's going to hurt
6. Think, Can he even get it in?
7. Think, I want to suck on that and see how far down my throat it will go
8. Think, I want to jack that off until mount vesuvius erupts and paints the ceiling
9. Think, LOL
I do wonder!
I know most women on here are just looking. They are here for the attention, not to actually get laid. I mean, what can you do with 100 friends? As a woman, I'm sure she could just shoot them a message (assuming the guy has messaged here, she can respond even if she's a standard member) or get on the IM and say, "let's fuck now" and be getting laid in no time. Do any of them do that?
Also, a lot of guys are flakes as well - they like the hunt but when comes time to pull the trigger, oops! Can't - flat tire.
I've been on SexBook Of Sex - Find Sex with Real People for Free since the 90's. I've met less than a dozen women and got intimate will probably half. Been stood up many, many times. That's not a real good record. Yet, I keep hoping - LOL - hope - the last to die.
So, if there are any women reading this, what DO you think when you see a cock pic?
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
How tough is it?
|
Posted:Oct 26, 2015 8:36 am
Last Updated:Apr 19, 2016 10:08 am
7678 Views
|
Mercy!
Yes, I'm only wanting sex. Don't want to date, play any of those games.
One might think, that on a sight like this that would not be all that difficult.
I can host most school days. I'll travel to their place or meet them somewhere. Basically, I'm fairly open as to where. The when? Sometimes nights work, but mostly days.
Yes, I'm older - but don't look it. Yes, I've "taught" women as young as 18 - they have been most grateful for the lessons (its great when they want more "instruction"). I know how to please a woman. I'm patient. But good hell!
Where are the women that need the morning sex, the nooner, the thrill of discreet trysts?
Evidently, not here.
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Sooo many flakes and fakes
|
Posted:Oct 21, 2015 9:41 am
Last Updated:Mar 18, 2021 7:39 pm
8438 Views
|
Its OK to flirt, to get online and garner the attention one so desperately needs. Its another to string along, get hopes up for a real meeting, a real tryst where real skin on skin, tongues, fingers, cock and all actually join together for that pure sexual pleasure.
Why don't women here just say, "I'm not going to meet - ever - but I'd surely like to talk, flirt and listen to what you'd do to me and how."?
Get real, women. Lose that bullshit paradigm of needing to be seduced first when all you want is pure sexual pleasure. The lies you tell yourself do not make a difference in the end. Just go with it.
As for me, I take, "No" for an answer. I respect that. Not everyone is attracted to everyone and we all have our dreams. But don't say, "Yes" when you have no intention of following through. Meet, have a drink, a conversation. You'll know in the first 10 seconds if there's any attraction. If there is none, simply say, "You know, you're nice, but its just not there." Any real man will smile, will appreciate that and you can part friends, without any animosity. Try it some time!
|
|
|
1
comment
|
|
Sooo many flakes and fakes
|
Posted:Oct 21, 2015 9:41 am
Last Updated:Apr 16, 2024 2:33 am
7446 Views
|
Its OK to flirt, to get online and garner the attention one so desperately needs. Its another to string along, get hopes up for a real meeting, a real tryst where real skin on skin, tongues, fingers, cock and all actually join together for that pure sexual pleasure.
Why don't women here just say, "I'm not going to meet - ever - but I'd surely like to talk, flirt and listen to what you'd do to me and how."?
Get real, women. Lose that bullshit paradigm of needing to be seduced first when all you want is pure sexual pleasure. The lies you tell yourself do not make a difference in the end. Just go with it.
As for me, I take, "No" for an answer. I respect that. Not everyone is attracted to everyone and we all have our dreams. But don't say, "Yes" when you have no intention of following through. Meet, have a drink, a conversation. You'll know in the first 10 seconds if there's any attraction. If there is none, simply say, "You know, you're nice, but its just not there." Any real man will smile, will appreciate that and you can part friends, without any animosity. Try it some time!
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Sooo many flakes and fakes
|
Posted:Oct 21, 2015 9:41 am
Last Updated:Apr 16, 2024 2:33 am
7506 Views
|
Its OK to flirt, to get online and garner the attention one so desperately needs. Its another to string along, get hopes up for a real meeting, a real tryst where real skin on skin, tongues, fingers, cock and all actually join together for that pure sexual pleasure.
Why don't women here just say, "I'm not going to meet - ever - but I'd surely like to talk, flirt and listen to what you'd do to me and how."?
Get real, women. Lose that bullshit paradigm of needing to be seduced first when all you want is pure sexual pleasure. The lies you tell yourself do not make a difference in the end. Just go with it.
As for me, I take, "No" for an answer. I respect that. Not everyone is attracted to everyone and we all have our dreams. But don't say, "Yes" when you have no intention of following through. Meet, have a drink, a conversation. You'll know in the first 10 seconds if there's any attraction. If there is none, simply say, "You know, you're nice, but its just not there." Any real man will smile, will appreciate that and you can part friends, without any animosity. Try it some time!
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Habits
|
Posted:Jul 27, 2015 7:38 am
Last Updated:Oct 6, 2015 7:11 am
8428 Views
|
LOL!
One can certain tell who works at the office and who doesn't. Interesting!
A lot of women get on around 6:30 and then, around 7:40, they start dropping off like flies. Those left? Often non-responsive which may suggest they have left as well, just forgot to log off.
Hmmm...wonder if there are any women that would love a visit from an IT guy to their office and enjoy getting eaten out under their desk?
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Another month, another flake
|
Posted:Jul 22, 2015 3:27 pm
Last Updated:Oct 28, 2020 5:08 am
8386 Views
|
An hour and a half drive round trip. Arrived at her door, rang bell. barked. Garbage sitting at the door. No answer. After ringing again. Left.
Returned to an email with some excuse. They are the same. If she were local, I might try again, but she's not worth the time.
So, on we go, seeking the non-flake, real woman (with real tits) that really wants to really fuck often and more.
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
To link to this blog (aftrnoons) use [blog aftrnoons] in your messages.
|
|
|
| Sun |
Mon |
Tue |
Wed |
Thu |
Fri |
Sat |
1
|
2
|
3
|
4
|
5
|
6
|
7
|
8
|
9
|
10
|
111
|
12
|
13
|
14
|
15
|
16
|
17
|
18
|
19
|
20
|
21
|
22
|
23
|
241
|
25
|
26
|
27
|
28
|
29
|
30
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
